Better Than A Hallelujah

You better grab your tissues for this one…to laugh or cry…or both!

God has blessed me in meeting so many wonderful people throughout my career.  And God has used them to fill my heart with laughter and with love along the way. Patsy Jones from Fayetteville, Alabama is one of them.  I have such great respect for her.  She is a humble and graceful friend who has a true servant’s heart. Although we rarely get to see each other, my soul smiles just thinking about her. And just like Patsy, her husband Troy was a humble and true servant too.  I only met him once, when he volunteered one summer morning to come share his gift of music at our Callie’s Kids “Fancy Nancy” Literary Arts camp. His gifts made the world a better place. And like Patsy, he impacted my life forever. Troy was a fantastic song writer. My favorite work of his, along with Gregory Becker, is a song Alan Jackson recorded called “When God Paints.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPgvIwsQMYY .  At times I, too, “take for granted the simple things”…and I need to look closer to see “there’s always a bigger picture I can’t explain.”

Now you may be more familiar with other hits that Troy collaborated on like “Shift Work”, recorded by Kenny Chesney and George Strait (Alyssa and I grin and sing this together every time we hear it).  “People are Crazy,” another favorite sung by Billy Currington, has that great line, “God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy.”  Funny, my family would agree with that line…my brothers might even substitute “people” to say “Kelly” is crazy.  The truth is on some hectic days, I am crazy.  I have 4 brothers, Lyon, Buddy, Jay and Tom… and I love each one of them.  I tell people that we are like north, south, east and west…so different from one another.  But we are also alike in ways….and sometimes I think THEY are the crazy ones. But at the end of the day, no matter how crazy things get or how mad or frustrated we get with one another….Love remains. And we know we love one another. It’s the greatest power on earth, the bond that ties us together.  And our faith is strong.  As Jaybird recently said, “Faith is the neosporin that heals life’s worry and anxiety.” See, I’m not the only crazy one in our family! And chances are some days you or your siblings are crazy too.

Another family fact…my cousins are pretty crazy too. Crazy funny. Crazy loyal. Crazy determined. Crazy love. The Wilsons and the Noels…both sides.  And I adore each one of them!   In fact, growing up with them has been one of the greatest blessings of my life because we were almost always laughing.  And laughter is great medicine.  It’s a wonderful thing, unless maybe you are in church or at a funeral. And of course, there were times we all gave our parents fits too!  For example, when one of my cousins and I were about 6 years old we were so mischievous that my aunt wouldn’t even take us to the grocery store together anymore.  I’d like to say we finally grew out of that, but that might not be completely true.  Recently I attended a funeral of our dear family friend, Danny Morrison, with my Aunt Nancy and that same cousin. (I won’t mention Sandra’s name to protect the not-so-innocent; oops, that slipped!)  Before the service started, one of us said something to the other one…something that in any other setting on any other day would not have been all that funny.  However, that day… in that setting… with our emotions on our sleeves at the reality that our dear friend was no longer on this earth… we started giggling….and giggling…to the point where I couldn’t stop. And the tears began to flow. Anyone watching would have thought we were so disrespectful, acting like those 6-year-old girls again.  But the truth was we were at peace knowing where our dearly departed friend was now. This was just our way to “laugh or cry” through our grief. Our sadness was not for Danny, we knew where his soul was. Our grief was for our own loss of his presence here on earth.  And our giggles, and tears, were just a way to release those bottled-up feelings. Now most people nod their heads, whisper a soft hallelujah, or allow a quiet tear to fall at funerals.  But the truth is, sometimes you just gotta let it out any way you can.  And yes, I’d rather laugh than cry.  So, if you see me or my cousins giggling at a funeral in the future, that’s probably not a bad thing because there is some peace, joy and a little hallelujah mixed in there. And I imagine that when Aunt Nancy reads this, she probably won’t ever take us to another funeral together again.

Now I just have to be blunt here, grief sucks, like a big sour lemon. And oftentimes grief takes time to process.   One of the most powerful ways God has ever helped me process mine was through losing my daddy. We lost him in March of 2022 and I’m so thankful for the times we shared leading up to that day.  Having moved to the Gulf Coast, I drove back to central Alabama to visit with him every other week for the last 6 months of his life. We would visit for a few days, then I’d come home mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted. And the next day I couldn’t wait to do it again. We shared some of the most meaningful conversations during those times that I will treasure forever.  During those months, God used Daddy to teach me about the important things in life. Things like love, laughter, faith and perseverance.  People have said that Coach Bryant liked Daddy because he was tough, not a quitter.  That may be true, but I love him for his loyalty to God and to his family. And his strength. He wasn’t always a man of a lot of words, but he knew how to get his point across.  During his later years, he would say “I love you” to me and Alyssa Lee by shaking his hand at us and raising three fingers that in sign language to say, “I love you.” I’ll skip the stories about the other “sign language” he taught Alyssa Lee…the one they would mischievously share with each other, behind my back, thinking I wasn’t watching. It was a message they often shared when we would ride away from visiting him at the farm when she was growing up, their funny, private little way of saying “I love you.” 

Daddy loved music.  In his final months, when his brain couldn’t recall the lyrics, his soul held on to the music. It was fun to watch him enjoy old classics. As I mentioned, Daddy was tough.  He wasn’t a quitter. I witnessed this 5 hours away as his amazing nurses would help us visit through Facetime on days when I couldn’t be there with him. Even when he was at his weakest moment, he was strong enough to make his point.  Surprisingly, while I didn’t make it home in time to be with Daddy as he took his last breath in this world, I’m at peace. I think his nurses knew I wouldn’t make it home in time to be with him; so they made sure that he and I could visit through Facetime one last time. I remember how very weak he was and how hard he was trying to say those special words “I love you,”  one last time…as I did the same.  And through God’s amazing grace and Daddy’s perseverance, his very last word to me in this world was “Love.”  He fought to get his point across, and I’ll always be grateful to God for that wonderful gift. It was a bittersweet moment for sure. It’s a moment that reminds me of Amy Grant’s song, “Better than a Hallelujah.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pd8iWDaOEOM .  It truly was better than a hallelujah.  It wasn’t the “goodbye” I had expected my whole life; but for me, it was better. God truly did have a better plan.  And Love was at the center of His plan.  God’s Love, His crazy, amazing Love, is good. Crazy good.  It’s the strongest ingredient in my lemonade. It’s a crazy kind of Love that truly is even better than a Hallelujah!   

Today’s Reflection

Music is a universal language.  Take some time this week to enjoy your favorite songs that remind you of the ones you love.  Ones that make you laugh and bring you joy.  And even ones that make you cry. Because if you have a sad moment, that’s ok. Trust me, I still have those too. I’ve learned it’s great medicine to shed tons of tears from laughter, and it can be really healing to allow those sad tears to fall as well. Because that’s how God created us.  And then remember that no matter what, Love remains.  It’s that special ingredient available for everyone’s own batch of lemonade.

Job 8:21

"God will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy."